lifeinflux

#24 Thirty Days of Fun

// August 2nd, 2011 // No Comments » // Life

I decided to start my new 101 things in 1001 days list off with a bang by giving myself thirty days of fun. Item #24 requires I give myself thirty days of fun for each year it takes me to complete this list. Since I am not scheduled to finish my 101 things until mid-2014, that gives me four years times thirty days of fun which equals 120 days where I am obligated to do something fun each and every single one of those days. Oh man, I know. I’m dreading it already. *grin*

 

On the road to living the Ultimate Life

// August 1st, 2011 // No Comments » // Featured Post

A few days ago, two friends of mine took off 2 months to take a 30 day bike trip through Europe and the UK as well as pursue additional adventures here in the US upon their return.  I had the pleasure of speaking to one of them the day before they left and, naturally, my first question was, “how can you guys do this?”   Her response was, “well we decided we wanted to do this, we saved and we’re doing it!”   Talk about inspiring words, words that sum up perfectly exactly how I want to live my life, and really the ultimate key to personal success.   And the timing of that conversation could not be better.  Just last week, I was chatting with Drue about my 101 in 1001.   Drue, in that wisdom kids often bring to the table (presuming we, the adults, are willing to listen), pointed out that if I really wanted to do all of the 101 things on my list, I’d do them already and not procrastinate, using my work and Drue’s schedule as a convenient excuse for not getting certain things done.  When I mentioned my lack of proper lenses to properly capture some of my tasks, the need to save for upcoming trips, hardware expansions in the business, etc. Drue reminded me that I would never take those excuses from her so she was going to do me a favor and not take them from me.  From that discussion, the new and improved (and oh so exciting to me!) 101 things in 1001 days list was born and I have happily removed  a few items that I felt I ought to do and added on a few items I want to do.    For example, at this point in my career, I would get more benefit out of taking courses towards certifications than work towards my Bachelors Degree (#42).   I also won’t feel as… stymied taking short online courses and weekend workshops towards my certification as I would being trapped in a multi-month classroom or online course.   Part of living the Ultimate Life is being to go where I want to go, when I want to go and achieving a work/life balance that allows me to pursue my passions while achieving my work goals.

But am I already living my Ultimate Life?  I would say, in a way, yes I am.   Because I don’t really define living the Ultimate Life as the end game, necessarily.   For me, a huge part of living the ultimate life is the journey it takes to get there and my goals, especially from the last two years,  are the keys to my success in living this life, the life that I want.    Since I am not a static creature, and since I have not yet reached the point of dropping everything for a few months of Ultimate Living, I am still on the road of my journey.  I am still working towards that ultimate goal.   That said, I absolutely can take a long weekend or week here and there and disconnect or work away from my home base, traveling and doing ultimate, fun things.  Two years ago, I was not in that position.   A year ago I was not in that position.   So I feel pretty good about the path I’ve taken, learning from others who have taken similar paths and, in doing their own thing and meeting their own goals, are already living their definition of an ultimate life.

To borrow from a long going Nike campaign, sometimes you have to get out there and just do it.   I think that’s indicative of exercise, living your ultimate life or tackling your 101 things in 1001 days.   An explanation of why certain things were crossed off my 101 list are below, if you’re interested.  In the coming days, the list will be moved to a top navigation page where I can link to each item, jot down my progress and capture pictures taken as I go about enjoying each item on my list.  Drue and I also started building our Ultimate Life List.  This is a list of places we often talk about visiting (or things we really want to do in particular places).  We decided it would be fun to stop talking about it, and start planning when and how we will go about each adventure.  My hope is that, as she gets older and lives her own Ultimate Life, on her own terms, that she’ll want her ole Mom along on some of her adventures.    Enjoy the new lists! And please, feel free to share any advice you have on achieving some of my 101 things, suggestions for the Ultimate Life List or even your own life adventures.    And feel free to come along for the ride, figuratively and literally.  Because what is an ultimate life without fantastic people sharing that life right along with you!

 

 

101 in 1001 days List Changes:
#3.  Changed Drive Route 66 to be with family for each and every Thanksgiving.  Moved “Drive Route 66″ to Ultimate Life List.
#4. Hike the Grand Canyon (down and back up again) was moved to the Ultimate Life List. Hike Ubehebe and Little Hebe craters (top to bottom and back again) is its replacement because we love Death Valley (and last time I went I could not finish the entire hike).
#5. Attend Burning Man was removed entirely from the list. I really have no desire to go to Burning Man. If I go at some point, great, and if not, whatever. I replaced this with go back to Texas and attend the Austin City Limits Music Festival because that is something I actually really want to do.
#12. Participate in 30 Daring Cooks/Daring Bakers challenges was removed because 95% of the recipe challenges don’t support our primal way of eating. My new #12 is to take the Primal Leap.
#13. Host one dinner party a month was updated to host one social event per month.
#14. Try a new dish – something I have not tried before – when dining out is almost impossible for me to do. I’ve tried just about every food they offer over the span of my lifetime and trying to accomplish this task was leaving me disgruntled and ruining what should have been some pretty nice dining out experiences. Try 101 new foods is my new goal.
#15. Take the Bear on a 2 mile walk five days a week and greet each person you see on the walk was – to borrow Bill and Ted’s favorite word – totally bogus. I do this anyway. A better goal – and something I’d love to do next year – is attend PrimalCon.
#21. Finish the Fauvist Media website, like walking Bear, is a total “DUH” factor goal. Now the goal of completing the 7-day Multi-Climate Complete Survivor Course… there’s a great Ultimate Life goal on my 101 list!
#24. Throw a block party was a great goal that few people in the neighborhood supported. So after getting very little positive feedback, I let that goal go and replaced it with a great goal. Each year, I’m give myself the gift of 30 days of fun. And I’m starting this particular 101 thing TODAY!!
#42. Take classes towards a Bachelor’s degree nas been replaced with take classes towards Compliance certification. Read above for why.
#50. Practice the 10 gifts everyday and demonstrate them in my ongoing communications with Drue was moved down to the “Love” area on my list. It seemed to fit better in that area. My replacement goal is to learn bad-ass knife skills in the kitchen and apply them to the art of cooking frequently. Yes, I am going to find a bad-ass knife skills class or two and get my Iron Chef down. Be scared… be very scared.
#51. Walk an average of five miles per day is another gimme goal and part of the goal for cutting down on the number of miles I drive. Work on 20 Things to Stop Doing to Others seemed like a harder and more fulfilling goal as it is not a gimme but something that will require me to pay attention to the way I communicate with and treat others.
#63. Act, karaoke or do a comedy routine on stage is a great goal for someone who wouldn’t throw up on others during the process. Make manicures, pedicures, and facials part of my ongoing monthly care is a much better goal and one I’ll enjoy immensely.
#67. Give up soda for 1001 days is not impossible but it makes me miserable, frankly. Sometimes I want a Diet Mountain Dew so badly, it drives me insane. And when I cannot have one, I drive others insane. A much more productive – and good for me – goal is to drink a cup of tea daily.
#69. I changed the “Get” in my goal of eight hours of sleep a night to “Average”. I’m a geek and an occasional insomniac. If I can average eight hours a night on a weekly or monthly basis, that is good enough for me (and for my body).
#73. Create an online gallery on Lifeinflux for my Lomo and other fun photography work was redundant (see #22). Practice the 10 gifts everyday and demonstrate them in my ongoing communications with friends and family, especially Drue belonged in the “Love” category so I moved it here.
#98. Go to Disneyland was replaced by see the calves and whales in their breeding lagoons near Cabo San Lucas because we’ve went to Disneyland after I rewrote the list in December of 2010 but before the list date so I felt like the trip should not be on the list.
#100. Eat pizza in Naples was moved to the Ultimate Life List. Go snorkeling in Bimini replaced it.

10. Write a letter each week.

// April 12th, 2011 // 1 Comment » // Featured Post

I have a list a mile long of things my Memaw made me do as a child that she swore I would thank her for someday. And while some of the items on those list are now things I’d rather pay someone else to do than actually do myself, writing a proper letter is one skill I actually would thank her for if she were around for me to thank. I am passing along this skill or what Drue refers to as a  mechanism of torture to her -  and no Drue, writing a thank you EMAIL or thank you post on Facebook is not the same – and feeling as if I am passing along a dying art that she will thank me for someday. Few people bother sending handwritten notes these days.  I mean, why bother, when a quick, grammatically incorrect email will do in a pinch, right? Or better yet, just pick up the phone and then you won’t have to do anything but hit a few letters on your phone’s contact list. Viola! Communication given, received and done in just a few minutes and now you and the other party can move on with each of your separate lives. I get it. In this fast paced world, who has time to write a letter? Writing a letter takes time, a lot of time.  You have to take the time to find a card.  Then you have to take the time to carefully construct your message in your mind and then there is the time to fill in all that imposing blank space.   You cannot erase or start from scratch with a letter like you can an email.   And then there is the task of finding a stamp, someone’s physical address and posting the letter.   Who seriously has the time, energy or motivation for all of that?

I absolutely, totally and completely understand this sentiment. I’m a prime example of the best intentions gone horribly awry when life gets busy. Here I am in April, 101 days into my 1001 days and how many letters have I written (not including thank you notes)?   NONE.   As of this week, I am fifteen letters behind where I said I would be 100 days ago.    I’m not sure I even have fifteen people to write to at the moment.  And I could probably make up for lost time by taking a day or two and just plunging into the task – I have 31 years of letter writing experience behind me to get the job done and done relatively quickly.  But that would only meet the letter of the task and not the intent.   The entire reason I decided to add this to my list of 1001 things was to reconnect with people.  The whole point of this exercise was to let certain people in my life know that I am thinking of them and care enough to find a card (or better yet, create a card) that reflects a particular sentiment or character trait I admire about them, write them a heartfelt message and then take the time to send it to them.  

When I read the letters sent to me from various pen pals and friends from my youth or the love letters sent from my respective grandparents to each other during World War II,  I realize that by relying on the spoken or emailed word  as a primary means of communication, we’re all missing out on something profound.   Something tangible.  Something memorable.    Sure, I kept all of Drue’s dad’s emails to me when we were dating but I doubt she’d be interested in reading an email thread debating whether it made sense for me to drive to Raleigh to eat at Lily’s Pizza before heading back to Chapel Hill for a show at the Cradle or just having Jason meet me at UNC and grabbing a bite at Ham’s.   Luckily, as Jays and I have matured, he has caught on to the importance of letter writing and the significance and longevity of saved cards and Drue can see our relationship mature from angry spouses to overwhelmed divorcees to committed co-parents through a variety of notes, cards and post-it notes.  At some point, maybe when she’s about to have a child of her own, I will happily share those momentos with her to give her a better perspective on parenting and commitment to ones child.

I don’t believe Drue will get a good, much less complete, perspective on who I am as a person reading what I’ve posted online as opposed to what she’ll read locked away in the privacy of my paper journals.   I do think, when the day comes for her to go through  my memory box and divulge of my secrets, she’ll decide I dated a bunch of mindless idiots since the majority of my letters and cards from men in my past life are some rendition of  “I’m sorry, I screwed up,  please forgive me and don’t dump me!”    I do have some fantastic cards from girl friends though and I think she’ll see that I have some amazing women in my life who think of me and think enough of me to put pen to paper and say hello!     From H2′s gorgeous handmade cards – some of which are framed and hang on the walls of my home – to Erin’s hysterical birthday card from a few years ago (complete with fortune telling bendy fish!), to gorgeous cards depicting homemade  Japanese brush paintings in tiny scale complete with haikus on the back from one of my dear childhood friends that appear at random over the years.    Each one is treasured.  Each one is kept and brought out from time to time.  Each card has a person and their story behind it, a story of shared experiences and friendship over the years, and each card and note is a work of art. Each letter is precious to me and helps define me as a person, and as someone’s friend and they allow my child to relate to me through my friendships and shared experiences with these people.   Yes, even the “I’m sorry” cards from ex-boyfriends past.

So until I get caught up and back on track, I’ll be sending two cards a week for the next fifteen weeks. And yes, some of these cards might be post cards as Drue and I travel around. And if you’re curious as to what my inspiration was for this project, feel free to read about The Thank You Note Project – Cultivating an Attitude of Gratitude. And check back here or in the 1001 items list for more information on this task!

101 things in 1001 days…

// December 1st, 2010 // 5 Comments » // The 101

After spending the last year working on my company, I revisited my 101 in 1001 days list. During my review, I realized I was focused on business and, often, set unrealistic goals. Now that things are perking along with Fauvist Media, I thought it was time to try, try again!

My mission: Complete 101 preset tasks in 1001 days.

The criteria: Tasks must be specific (i.e. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (i.e. represent some amount of effort on your part) but not so overwhelming they cannot be accomplished in 1001 days. Tasks must be blogged on each day as I work through the list. Pictures will also be supplied as proof that the task is being worked and/or is completed.

The Start Date: 01/01/2012
The Finish Date:09/28/2014

My list is split into four categories. Live is the first category and contains tasks that require me to get out of my comfort zone, interact with others and develop new relationships and friendships while preserving old friendships and family ties. Learn is a list of things I would either like to master or is something I am simply interested in investigating. I’ve tried to make sure the things I learn will either be physically or mentally challenging and/or fun. Because if it is not challenging or fun, what’s the point? Love is a series of tasks that are for me, that will improve my physical, mental and emotional well-being and make me feel good about my contributions to my little slice of life. Lush is exactly that – tasks that are a true pleasure and something I want to do for me just because. I mean, really. What is the point of having a list of things to do if some of them aren’t pure pleasure for pleasure’s sake!

The ListLive
1. Dip my feet in the Atlantic Ocean at sunset, drive across the country and dip my feet in the Pacific Ocean at sunrise.
2. Spend some time touring Europe alone.
3. Be with family for each and every Thanksgiving.
4. Hike Ubehebe and Little Hebe craters (top to bottom and back again)
5. Attend the Austin City Limits Music Festival.
6. Attend the Calgary Stampede
7. Attend Mardi Gras in New Orleans
8. Attend the Great American Beer Festival in Denver, CA
9. Attend BlogHer
10. Go salsa dancing.
11. Go zorbing.
12. Take the Primal Leap.
13. Host one social event a month.
14. Try 101 new foods.
15. Attend PrimalCon.
16. Participate in the 100 strangers project.
17. Swim with sharks.
18. Meet online friends in person.
19. Join a monthly book club that meets in person.
20. Participate in a team sport.
21. Complete the 7-day Multi-Climate Complete Survivor Course
22. Create photography/gallery site.
23. Ride a zipline.
24. Go on a cruise.
25. Go on a blind date.

Learn

26. Learn how to ride a bike.
27. Learn how to juggle.
28. Learn to snowboard.
29. Learn how to fish.
30. Relearn how to roll a kayak.
31. Take salsa classes.
32. Create a successful blog.
33. Learn how to play chess well.
34. Make something using my new sewing machine.
35. Make paper, and then make something from that paper.
36. Create a CD of my music.
37. Take an art class.
38. Learn to play guitar well.
39. Participate in one of sh1ft.org’s photography projects.
40. Learn how to sail.
41. Learn to speak proper French.
42. Indulge in a creative bootcamp like NaNoWriMo or Scott McCloud’s Making Comics
43. Take a photography class.
44. Learn how to meditate.
45. Take a yoga class.
46. Learn how to knit.
47. Learn how to crochet.
48. Listen to 1000 new songs and find appreciation in music that is not within my comfort zone.
49. Get my SCUBA certification.
50.Learn bad-ass knife skills in the kitchen and apply them to the art of cooking frequently.

Love
51. Work on 20 Things to Stop Doing to Others
52. Run a 10K.
53. Swim 300 meters (12 laps) effortlessly.
54. Be a mentor.
55. Read a book from the 1001 Children’s Books to Read Before You Grow Up list with Drue at least three nights a week.
56. Reduce trash output to one bag of trash per week.
57. Perform random acts of kindness to at least 5 strangers without expecting anything in return.
58. No more conspicuous plastic use.
59. Walk (or bus) to the local farmers markets or local grocery stores.
60. Give myself 30 days of fun.
61. Compost.
62. Reduce the number of power vampires in the house by half.
63.  Scan family photographs to create digital records of all photos and make books as a way of preservation.
64. Participate in the 365 days project.
65. Make 101 handmade, lovely things.
66. Donate whole blood every 90 days.
67. Read 52 books in 52 weeks.
68. Give up swearing for 30 days.
69. Average eight hours of sleep a night.
70. Complete a CPR and basic first aid course.
71. Build a Habitat for Humanity home.
72. Conduct a one year happiness project.
73.  Create a morning writing ritual.
74. Be debt free.
75. Have three months of savings tucked away that goes untouched.

Lush
76. Sleep and dine in a castle.
77. Have dinner at the French Laundry.
78. Attend the San Francisco Black and White Ball
79. Two hours each week are mine to spend as I like.
80. Drink a milkshake at Fosselman’s.
81. Have dinner at Chez Panisse.
82. Drink whiskey in a pub in Ireland.
83. Purchase my new camera and the necessary lenses to pursue my craft.
84. Create a space within my home that nurtures me creatively.
85. Take a mud bath in Calistoga.
86. Go horseback riding on the beach.
87. Spend a weekend at Cavallo Point.
88. Spend the night in a museum.
89. Spend the night in a tree house.
90. Ride the Napa Valley Wine Train.
91. Go on a hot air balloon ride.
92. Spend a weekend day touring Napa and Sonoma by limo.
93. Rent a limo for the night.
94. Take the New York Dinner Cruise.
95. Eat beignets at the Café du Monde.
96. Pull off the perfect road trip.
97. Collect art I love from artists I love to support.
98. See the calves and whales in their breeding lagoons near Cabo San Lucas.
99. Buy a year’s subscription to the opera.
100. Go snorkeling in Bimini.
101. Have high tea at Fortnum & Mason in London.

Amending the 101…

// March 3rd, 2010 // 2 Comments » // Life

I’m not entirely sure how to sum up the last seven days of my life.   It feels a bit like teleporting.   At least, it feels like I’d imagine teleporting would be.   You know, you start in one place and then you feel yourself get all split apart and then all of a sudden you’re in an entirely NEW and different place but are all together.   The latest, newest and biggest news is that the Gloeges have gone all “I Can’t Believe We’re Not Vegan”.    And by that I mean we’re not truly vegan because we are not swearing off meat forever.  I’m sorry but I need the real deal at Thanksgiving.   Tofurkey is not going to cut it.   And I’d rather give up anything else in the universe food-wise except sushi.   So there may be an occasional noshing of the raw fish.   But otherwise, we have given up meat, dairy, raw sugar and white, processed foods.  How and why we decided to do this is a whole ‘nother post – and one that may be posted over where my new project (TBA soon!) lives, but suffice it to say that we, as a family, have never eaten or pooped so well.  And that’s all I’m saying about that.  You can thank me later.
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Plan of attack

// December 23rd, 2009 // 3 Comments » // Life

Last night I peeked at my progress on my 101 things in 1001 days list and, to be honest, it’s not great. Sure, I managed to juggle building my company and landing those first few, all-important contracts while running the Drama Club program at Drue’s school. And that is an accomplishment in and of itself. And I managed those long 60 plus hour work weeks without consuming a drop of soda. And I managed one Daring Cooks challenge back in late October but I did not have the time to really give the challenge a lot of thought and due diligence so I want to repeat the challenges for that month as well as take on November’s, December’s and January’s challenges during the month’s of January and February. Did I mention I’ve brought in two contracts for my company with an upcoming third and fourth contracts pending in the wings?   Granted, movement on them is slow since I am splitting my time between business development, filing paperwork to make this company a reality and the actual work of the company. I have a part time developer, may have found a full time developer (won’t say definite until he’s actually hired), and have a freelance graphic designer on stand-by for some upcoming projects in the spring. Sure, that’s pretty good but I know I’d be doing twice the work if I had been well for the bulk of my fall season.   The flu came a’ knockin in late October followed immediately by a double bout of bronchitis.  These two illnesses cut a swath though the time, energy and well-being of the Gloege family and I, for one, am sick of being sick.
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Denial

// October 19th, 2009 // 9 Comments » // Uncategorized

The Kübler-Ross model, better known as the five stages of grief, can really be applied to all areas of life. For example, while writing my 101 goals in 1001 days, I was definitely in stage one, denial. It’s not that I was unrealistic in setting my goals; and even after a week’s contemplation I still believe I will meet and, in some cases, surpass my goals by July 2012. That said, I think I was smoking something illegal when I came up with a few of these goals. There is really no other explanation for it. And while those of you who know me might remind me that I’ve become the worst RW of all time since quitting cigarettes back in July of 2006 (July 7th, 2006 to be exact), maybe I inhaled someone’s second-hand smoke while writing these.  Granted, my neighbors don’t look like crack-imbibing junkies but how well do you know people, really?
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Thirty five is a very attractive age…

// October 12th, 2009 // 3 Comments » // Uncategorized

At least, so says Oscar Wilde. I’m inclined to agree for purely personal reasons.

T.S. Eliot once said: “I don’t believe one grows older. I think that what happens early on in life is that at a certain age one stands still and stagnates.” Stagnate was a great way to describe my mental state for the past few years.   In 2004, I was 30.  I was separated from Jason and trying to make it on my 1997 salary after several years out of the traditional job market while at home caring for Drue.  In 2005, I was divorced and for the first time in a long time had to think about things like affordable health insurance.   By 2006, 55 to 60 hour work weeks were the norm, not the exception and I was fully entrenched and moving forward quickly in the career path I began back in 1994 when I left school and left in 1999 when Drue was born.    In 2007, I left that job after 2 years and jumped quickly into another.   My intentions on leaving my job in 2007 was to take a few months off and figure out what I really wanted to do.   However, I was promised the opportunity to build a system and manage the team that would support that system ongoing, which was the next logical step in my career.  Unfortunately, that promised opportunity never came to fruition.  This was no one’s fault; but the reality is that I worked for more than two years at a job I did not enjoy for a myriad of reasons.    Ultimately, I think the issue back in 2004 was that I wanted a paycheck and re-entered the workforce in the same career I left back in 1999 without taking full accounting of my growth, interests and passions developed during the five years I was out of the traditional job market.
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I’m not an interesting person?

// July 28th, 2009 // 5 Comments » // Life

In recent months, I’ve discovered I’m a relatively uninteresting person.  I can talk about things I do did at work, I can discuss the book I’m currently reading, the cool stuff I did in my early 20s, every moment of my child’s life and I can stretch conversation about the weather to three minutes.   Once the conversation moves beyond these few topics, I’m at a loss for what to say and often say something inappropriate or stupid. My doctor tried really hard to blame it on Asperger’s (which I don’t have) and ADD (which I do have) but after multiple tests determined that I try to be social but really don’t have much to say.  Luckily, my friends forgive me for being a dullard and most of them manage to listen to me talk about my child copiously without getting a glazed look on their face.     What can I say?  Drue has a bigger life than I do! The good news is that I have good friends and am very thankful for that. But I think it’s time to put them, and me, out of our collective misery.

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